Micronaxx

This week marks my second week back at work, and also the passage of my 36th birthday*. The number 36 has been much harder for me to deal with than the mental and emotional challenges of being back at work! I knew I was of “advanced maternal age” while I was pregnant, but somehow, being 36 puts me unequivocally in my Late Thirties. Not something I’m super excited about.
Transitioning back to work has gone relatively smoothly. I was really dreading leaving my little Finn with someone else during the day, and worrying about how he’d deal with the transition. I’m sure this is true for all working moms, and it’s probably harder on the mom than the baby.
The good news is, both he and I are doing really well with it. Our babysitter Carol (not a Nanny, but closer to a surrogate Granny) is terrific, and she and Finn get along like gangbusters. Plus, I get to see Finn at lunchtime, which is nice for the both of us. And knowing that Finn is in really good hands lets my brain focus on work, and I am glad to be back, having just taken on a new, challenging assignment that will demand a lot of my gray matter.
* Meanwhile Finn turned 100–days old, that is.
[PS: Speaking of Carol, here are a pair of shots of the two of them in action. 😉 –J.]

…and hello sleep-deprivation!
Well, it’s official. Finn is now waaaaay too big, even for the Amazing Miracle Blanket we’ve been using to swaddle him for sleep. He keeps busting out of it Incredible Hulk-style, with arms and legs akimbo after only an hour or two in bed. He wakes himself up as he struggles to get untangled, so we’ve decided just to quit swaddling cold turkey.

So the upside is, our little guy is growing up! And the downside is, he probably won’t sleep quite so long or soundly without the confines of the swaddling…with his arms free, he’s more prone to waking himself up or thinking that it’s playtime instead of sleeptime. We got our first taste of this last night, with several wakenings after his 8:30 bedtime (9:30, 10:15, 1:15).

The other factor playing into Mom and Dad’s sleep deprivation is the fact that Finn’s sleeping pattern is evolving, and when he partially wakes in between deep sleep cycles, he’s more awake and often doesn’t resettle very easily. So we SWAT team him with shushing and the pacifier in hopes of getting him back to sleep before he gets a second wind. This is harder during the day/naptime when his room is lighter and there’s more to look at when his eyes open. We had a weekend full of 35-minute naps and unsuccessful attempts to get him to roll over and go back to sleep. So we’re working on it, and believe me, it takes a LOT of patience to try and settle a wakeful, unhappy-about-still-being-in-the-crib baby. For 30 minutes of trying, you may get nowhere, or you may get another 1/2 hour of sleeping. Our babysitter Carol is also doing her part to help get Finn to resettle himself without so much intervention, and we’ll be giving her a Presidential Patience Medal, too!

As a new mom, I have started keeping a mental tally of so-called “losses” related to pregnancy. Some are welcome and expected, others…well, not so much.
Post-pregnancy weight loss? Hooray! I’ll take more of that, please. 35 lbs in one week must be a record, and I have continued to slowly shed the remaining extra 10 lbs of pregnancy weight thanks to breastfeeding.
Losing pregnancy-related constant heartburn? Thank goodness. I was about to become a major shareholder in Gaviscon, but once Finn was born, my heartburn was over.
Losing what seems to be a ton of my hair? No, gracias! This part sucks! Apparently when you’re pregnant, you stop shedding hair. But a few months after you give birth, all that hair you didn’t shed for 9 months starts coming out by the handful. I shed so much I could start my own wig factory! I’m surprised I actually have any hair left, but I guess to the casual observer I look just fine.
Losing sleep? Well, no one’s a big fan of that, but what are you gonna do? Finn’s actually doing really well here, sleeping longer and longer at night, which is a blessing for all of us, so I can’t really complain.

Finn has now successfully completed the transition from sidecar (the co-sleeper in our room) to the crib in his own room. For the past week or so, we have been sleeping in Finn’s room just to make sure things went smoothly. Honestly, sleeping in his room is probably mostly due to my own insecurity about leaving my little boy to sleep alone in his room! We’ve been sleeping next to each other ever since he came home from the hospital, and although I know he will be fine on his own in there, it’s a little hard for me to make the transition.
To help make it easier, we picked up a video baby monitor, a.k.a. FinnTV. This will help us hear and see Finn at night so we can figure out if he’s actually awake and needs attention, or if he’s just rustling around in his sleep. His room is so dark at night you can barely see him to tell if he’s awake or not, so the little videocam with night vision should really help. Because believe me, I want to avoid any unnecessary wake-ups! And now that he’s down to one middle-of-the-night feeding the trip from upstairs to Finn’s room and back won’t be such a big deal. (Oh, and 2 night lights along the stairwell will help, too!)

Among Finn’s little pile of toys (e.g. “Jingle Frog” and “Jingle Duck,” who we think go by “Dave” and “Henrietta” when they’re off duty) is a very large, captivating tube filled with little beads that shuffle noisily from one end to the other. One end of the tube is stamped prominently, “Made in Israel.”
Talking to my Israeli friend Uri yesterday, I mentioned that we play with the “Israttle” and wonder whether this makes Finn an honorary “Israttlite.” He replied, “I’m proud our ancient nation is contributing to your son’s development. We gave the world the Ten Commandments, nagging moms and rattles :)”

We’ve all heard how important it is to recognize and take advantage of “windows of opportunity.” This could not be more true when it comes to getting Finn down for a nap. I have found, through incredibly painful (and loud) trial and error, that one does NOT want to miss the nap window. This window is very distinct and is not open very far, so you’ve got to be alert and slip him through that narrow opening as fast as you can!
I was at my wit’s end last week, trying to get him to nap without going through major histrionics prior to the final surrender to sleep. I’m not kidding–sometimes up to 40 minutes of shooshing, swaddling, rocking, cajoling, crying (both Finn and me), squalling, etc. And then the payoff might only be a 30 minute nap. Frustrating, to say the least.
This was obviously not working for either of us–Finn wasn’t getting good naps, I was getting more exasperated each time I needed to put him down. I reread a bunch of my baby sleep books and rededicated myself to figuring out when the “nap window” opens–i.e. he is sleepy and receptive to relaxing, but not overtired and hard to settle. I also decided to change my soothing strategy–less stimulation during playtime (fewer rattles and jingly things in his face), no rocking or walking around (which is killing my back, since he’s almost 16 lbs! Plus, rocking and walking are additional stimuli).
My new approach: scoop him up on the first big yawn (the second or third is WAY too late), swaddle him, turn on the lullaby CD, dim the room, sit down and start shooshing/patting his bottom. Yes, he still squawks, but only a few short ones before he settles right down and closes his eyes. From start to finish, it takes 10-15 minutes, and then I pop him in the crib. This is exponentially less time than ever before. I almost can’t believe it’s actually working! It feels really good to have turned a corner on naptime! (I have actually done a couple of victory laps around the living room after getting him down.) [She’s not kidding about that! –J.]

Whew. Well this time the vaccinations went much more smoothly. Finn had a full tummy, a preemptive dose of infant Tylenol, and a quick nap before he got the shots. He was remarkably calm, and only cried for a grand total of 5 seconds during and immediately after the shots. As soon as I got him onto my lap, he chilled out completely. Thank God that nurse was so fast with the syringes!
We had another weigh-in as well, just to make sure he’s getting enough to eat. I have been feeding him a bit less each meal in hopes of stemming the fountains of spit-up that accompany every feeding. He’s doing great, of course, as my ever-larger biceps can attest…he is up to 15 lbs 12 oz! The Tiny Giant roars ahead, stomping all smaller, wimpier babies in his path!

It’s 9:02 p.m. and Finn knows EXACTLY where I am. He KNOWS. Even though he’s “asleep” he knows that he’s not in my arms, nor in John’s arrms, which is where he’d most definitely prefer to be. He knows that I am nearby but not nearby enough to make him sleep like the dead.
I have noticed a lot of interesting and also frustrating elements of Finn’s sleep patterns. There’s the 10-Minute Rule, which is the rule that guarantees 10 minutes (almost to the exact second) after you transfer Finn from your arms to the crib or bassinett, he will WAKE UP like a bolt of lightening and start complaining–regardless of how soundly he was sleeping while you were holding him. Honestly, he will be absolutely stone cold motionless in your arms the entire time he’s there, and 10 minutes after you move him, once his little brain catches on, the jig is most definitely up. I’ll let you know what’s happening at 9:12 p.m., exactly 10 minutes after I put him back in his bassinett after he woke up (which was 10 minutes after John put him down for the night).
The 10-Minute Rule is the reason there is so much attempted sleep subterfuge with babies. It seems like we spend a lot of time tricking them into falling asleep, staying asleep, and not letting them catch on that they’ve been transferred to an actual bed. The rocking, shushing, swaddling, swaying, pacifying, ever-so-gentle depositing of said baby into the crib so as not to wake him, it’s all just so much trickery to keep them asleep. And the majority of the time none of it works at all. He wakes up, you start all over again, and hope that the next time it sticks so you can go to sleep. I would be really interested to tally up the number of hours moms and dads spend rocking their kids into submission!
I’m sure these traits are all remnants of primitive man…it was probably pretty critical for little humanoids to be hyper-aware of where they were and whether there was any danger or weirdness afoot, particularly while sleeping. Now how that translates into a 10 minute delay I have no idea. The saber-toothed tiger hovering near the mouth of your cave would certainly have devoured you in less than 10 minutes, right?
Well, it’s 9:13 p.m. and althougth Finn’s making tons of awake-ish noises, I don’t think he’s actually awake. So i’ve outsmarted him for at least 11 minutes this time.