- Cave System Discovered In Mom & Dad’s Bed; Spelunking Missions Planned (“KindaDEEP!”)
- Driveway Closed 3pm-3:14pm For Dirt-Blasting
- Choco Overwhelms Area Toddler’s Boca
- “Gato MooGeek” Still Tops Music Charts
- Leonine Blankie Retains “Most Favored Buddy” Status; Duke The Raccoon Strong #2
- Wiggle-Smile Index Skyrockets on Local Playmat
- “Boogie-Sucker” Deployed To Area Infant’s Nose
- “Nut-Byyuck” Assails Driveway
- Mom Invests Heavily in Oxy-Clean Corp., Citing Childrens’ Future
Stay tuned for word from the Delmas Nack-Intelligencer 😉